


from dusk to dawn

by rielity (snowdrops)



Category: IDOLiSH7 (Video Game)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Gen or Pre-Slash, IDOLiSH7 Part 3 Spoilers, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:34:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24405115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowdrops/pseuds/rielity
Summary: Tenn is more shaken by the events on the day of the Tokyo Music Arts Festival than he lets on. At a loss as to how to help him, Gaku and Ryuu turn to Izumi Mitsuki.Contains spoilers up to Part 3, Chapter 12.
Relationships: Izumi Iori & Izumi Mitsuki, Izumi Mitsuki & Kujou Ten, Izumi Mitsuki & Nikaidou Yamato & Rokuya Nagi, Izumi Mitsuki & Yaotome Gaku, Izumi Mitsuki/Kujou Ten, Kujou Ten & Nanase Riku, Kujou Ten & Tsunashi Ryuunosuke & Yaotome Gaku
Comments: 3
Kudos: 46





	1. GAKU

**Author's Note:**

> this fic is like a fever dream

Gaku is lying in an unfamiliar bed, in an unfamiliar room. In the next bed, Ryuu snores away lightly. On the other side of the wall, Tenn must be fast asleep.

With all their overseas work assignments, it’s far from the first time he’s sharing a hotel room with Ryuu, but this particular situation is foreign. After they were reunited at the Zero Arena, Anesagi had booked them a suite, insisting that they stay the night together while arrangements were made to ensure the safety of their personal residences. At the time, Gaku thought it all blown out of proportion, but his father and Anesagi refused to budge, so here he is, staring a hole into the ceiling.

Now that he’s here lying in the darkness, he has to grudgingly admit that perhaps Anesagi was right, because sleep is not forthcoming today. Unease continues to prickle at the underside of his skin, as though the shock of the day’s events has finally sunk in on his consciousness. But they have an early schedule tomorrow, and Tenn will be on his case again if he wakes up with rings under his eyes in the morning.

Giving up, he fumbles for his phone on the bedside table where he’d left it to charge. Unplugging it, he gets out of bed. The floor is freezing; he grimaces a little before finding the flimsy bedroom slippers and padding out of the room.

There’s a dim light left on in the living room, so Gaku settles down on the couch. The light spills warm over him here, as Tokyo continues to glitter coldly outside the window.

The clock reads one when he clicks on his phone. There are a few new messages on his Rabbit Chat — he thumbs through them distractedly. Some instructions from Anesagi in the group chat on picking them up from the hotel later, which he’ll reply in the morning to avoid getting his ear chewed off for being awake at this hour; messages from Tsumugi, Momo-san, even Nikaidou. It’s both comforting and embarrassing to know they had worried so many people.

He’s just finished replying to the last of them — Nikaidou — when he sees a chat window he’d missed, buried as it had been by all the messages that had come in after.

**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Hey, Yaotome

**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** I hope you’re sleeping now

**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Kujou looked pretty shaken earlier

**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** I’ll text him tomorrow, but keep an eye on him?

**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Take care, all of you

Brief and to the point. Tenn had spared the details earlier, but he’d said that Izumi-ani and Nanase were the ones who found him, before Rokuya came to finish the job. That Rokuya… he’d also freed Ryuu, hadn’t he? What a puzzling person.

Gaku shakes off the thought. Tenn had looked shaken? Tenn had appeared fine when they regrouped at the Zero Arena, but Izumi-ani has a good eye for people and Tenn has a penchant for hiding his true feelings.

**[YAOTOME GAKU]:** Hey  
 **[YAOTOME GAKU]:** Sorry for the late reply  
 **[YAOTOME GAKU]:** I’ll keep an eye out for him  
 **[YAOTOME GAKU]:** Thanks again, Izumi-ani

His gaze drifts towards the closed door to the second bedroom, which they’d given to Tenn, as is always the case whenever they have to lodge together. Is Tenn really okay? It’s easy to forget that despite everything, Tenn is still young. Even now, there are times when Gaku doesn’t know what goes on in that head of his.

His phone lights up.

**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Wow, you should go to sleep, Yaotome  
 **[YAOTOME GAKU]:** I can say the same for you, though?  
 **[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Can’t sleep?

Gaku smiles in exasperated fondness. Trust Izumi-ani to always know what’s up. They spend the next half hour exchanging messages back and forth about nothing in particular. The mundanity is soothing; it’s not long before he feels exhaustion creeping up on him at last. Sending one more message to Izumi-ani to say goodnight, he heads towards the kitchenette on the other side of the room. He’ll get a drink before a second attempt at sleep.

It’s when he’s passing by Tenn’s room that he hears a sound from within. The walls must not be very thick, Gaku thinks to himself, as he comes to a stop in front of Tenn’s door.

On the other side, he can hear a muffled whimper.

Then another, choked-out and strangled.

Tenn is mumbling; there’s an unfamiliar colour to his voice that sends all the goosebumps on Gaku’s skin standing.

Carefully, he clicks the door open, in time to hear Tenn shout, “Riku, _get out_! Izumi Mitsuki, get him out!”

It’s panic. Gaku has never heard Tenn sound like this, all composure lost, his careful front ripped apart by something invisible.

He crosses the room in two strides, flicking on the bedside lamp as he reaches down to clasp at Tenn’s shoulder a bit too forcefully. In the sudden light, he can see clearly Tenn’s hands fisted into his blanket, Tenn’s brows furrowed together in distress. He looks painfully young like this. “Oi, Tenn, wake up,” he says, giving Tenn’s slight frame a hard shake. “Tenn. _Tenn_.”

Tenn stirs on the third call, his body clamming up as he registers the hold Gaku has on him. Gaku lets go immediately. Tenn stares up at him, eyes wide and frantic, breathing in short, ragged pants. “Gaku?”

“You were having a nightmare,” Gaku says. ...What else should he say? He’s out of his depth with Tenn like this, but he knows Tenn will try to brush it off.

“I see,” Tenn says, and it’s like he’s closed a window against a thunderstorm, because whatever unguardedness had been in his eyes earlier has been shuttered off and he’s back to that frustratingly neutral tone of voice. “Sorry for waking you up. You can go back to sleep.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Gaku presses. He can’t leave Tenn here when he’s obviously in pain.

Tenn’s fists clench in his blanket again, a movement that Gaku can’t help but notice. “No, I’m fine. We have to get up early tomorrow, let me go back to sleep.”

“Tenn—”

“ _Gaku_.” Tenn says, the word escaping like a hiss. “I’m fine.”

Gaku gives in. It’s obviously not true, anyone with eyes can see that, but he doesn’t want to fight with Tenn in the middle of the night. Not when they have work tomorrow, not when Tenn already looks so exhausted.

He sighs. “Fine. I’ll see you in the morning. Goodnight, Tenn.”

“Goodnight,” Tenn says, curling up into his blankets and turning away from Gaku. The bedside lamp is still switched on when Gaku clicks the door shut.

* * *

Morning comes too soon after a fitful rest. Tenn doesn’t make any mention of last night, but neither does he comment on Gaku taking more time than usual to conceal his eye bags. Ryuu is sombre today, too, and when Anesagi arrives to pick them up she tells them their evening schedule has been cancelled. The suite has also been booked for another night, she adds, and they are to stay put here on the president’s orders.

Unwilling though he is to be kept away from his house, Gaku takes small comfort in that. It’s a relief to know that he’ll be able to keep an eye on Tenn for the time being.

That Tenn doesn’t protest this arrangement is the most concerning of all. It feels like TRIGGER is going to pieces right before his eyes, and Gaku doesn’t know where to start holding them together.

* * *

Their schedules go as well as they possibly can, all things considered. Today, more than ever before, there are whispers behind their backs and unfriendly gazes. Gaku can feel them pinning them down, as though there are huge painted targets on their backs. Knowing it’s pointless to fight back doesn’t make it any less frustrating. All he can do is push Tenn in front of him, and have Ryuu close by his side, as though by doing so they can at least protect Tenn from the brunt of it.

Anesagi drops by with dinner in the evening. It’s a quiet meal, nothing like the party that they should have held after a successful performance at the Tokyo Music Arts Festival. Even so, like a well-rehearsed act, Gaku and Tenn bicker over something irrelevant, and Ryuu steps in to break them apart while Anesagi chides their childishness.

The spell breaks when Anesagi leaves. Tenn announces he’s turning in early, and Gaku walks into the living room to find Ryuu gazing out of the floor-length windows, across the sprawling metropolis that surrounds them.

“Tenn was off today,” Ryuu says quietly, when he catches sight of Gaku’s reflection in the window. “So were both of us.”

Gaku barks out a humourless laugh as he sinks into the couch. “It would be strange if we weren’t, wouldn’t it? There’s no way anyone would come out of that kind of situation and be perfectly fine.”

“I’m worried for Tenn,” Ryuu says. Gaku knows. Tenn had been stellar on set, as always, but he’d hidden away in the dressing room every chance he got, and he’d been quiet whenever it was just the three of them. He hadn’t even tried to pretend things were fine; what had he gone through?

“He had a nightmare last night,” Gaku says, and Ryuu’s brows immediately pull together. “He was yelling for Nanase and Izumi-ani.”

“Mitsuki-kun? Did you try contacting him? Maybe he’ll know something.”

“Yeah. He told me to keep an eye out for Tenn last night… I dropped him a message earlier today, but he said if Tenn didn’t want to tell us about what happened then it wasn’t his place to say. He said he was in touch with Tenn, though. He’s good at caring for others, Izumi-ani.”

“It sounds selfish, but I’m glad there’s someone other than us looking out for Tenn,” Ryuu says, though he still looks worried. “With the way things are…”

Gaku heaves a sigh in agreement. Were this any other time, he would have cut to the chase and cleared the air with Tenn, but he doesn’t know the full situation and things are fragile enough as they are. They can’t risk any conflict within the group now, so anyone that Tenn is willing to talk to is heaven-sent. Gaku files away a mental note to treat Izumi-ani to a good meal and drinks when this all is over.

Who knows when that will be.

* * *

In the middle of the night, Gaku wakes up with a start. He’s not sure why he’s awake, but he glances over to find Ryuu sitting up in the next bed.

“Did you—” _have a nightmare,_ Gaku’s about to ask, when Ryuu shakes his head and puts a finger to his lips.

“I heard something from Tenn’s room.”

Gaku listens intently. There’s the sound of something trashing, then a broken sob. “Riku, Riku, _Riku—_ Stop, d-don’t hurt him— I’m here— don’t touch h—”

Gaku turns around to Ryuu, feeling as helpless as Ryuu looks.

“I’ll go wake him up,” Ryuu says, braving a smile. “My younger brothers used to have nightmares too.”

“Okay,” Gaku says. “But— don’t make him talk about it if he doesn’t want to. He’s already—”

“I know,” Ryuu says, smiling a little wider this time.

The noise ceases within the next minute, but even underneath Ryuu’s low baritone through the wall, Gaku can hear the hitching of Tenn’s breath.

Ryuu comes back barely five minutes later, looking drawn and worried. “He didn’t want to talk to me. Do you think we should call Mitsuki-kun? It’s a big favour to ask, but...” Who else can they turn to, at this point?

It’s just past midnight, Gaku’s phone informs him. Izumi-ani usually sleeps early, and Gaku doesn’t even know if he has work tomorrow. But what if they go back to their own homes tomorrow, and Tenn is all alone in that big house of Kujou’s? Or _worse_ , what might Kujou do if he hears Tenn crying for his abandoned twin brother?

The thought is so unbearable that Gaku taps the call button.


	2. MITSUKI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A good part of this chapter was written while listening to Mitsuki's solo, [Mikazuki no Veil](https://open.spotify.com/track/4Svn3SXXQ4ziyH6hoAzMjR?si=4aHv4ZyzQsik7sU7gezAPQ).

Mitsuki is lying in bed when his phone rings, interrupting the song he had been listening to.

He stares at the name flashing on the screen in confusion, before picking up. It’s past midnight, what does Yaotome need from him at this hour that warrants a call?

“Izumi-ani?” Yaotome rumbles down the line. His voice sounds rough, as though he’s just woken up.

“Hello, Yaotome? What is it?”

“It’s… about Tenn,” Yaotome says, sounding almost hesitant. “Say, do you have any work tomorrow?”

“No, I don’t,” Mitsuki says, frowning. “I have the weekend off.”

“Can I pay you to keep Tenn company for a night? Starting… uh, now?”

“ _What?_ ” Mitsuki asks, sitting upright, the sudden movement dislodging the plushie that had been on his blanket. It rolls off onto the ground. “Wait, Yaotome, start from the top. What’s going on with Kujou?”

“He’s having nightmares,” Yaotome says. “Bad ones. Last night and tonight— he’s been calling for Nanase but he doesn’t want to tell us why. He mentioned you too, so we figured it had to do with what happened yesterday, especially since you told me to keep an eye on him-”

Mitsuki pinches the bridge of his nose. He’d texted Kujou earlier in the day, but Kujou had thanked him for his concern and said that he was feeling fine. Then Mitsuki had to go for work and didn’t get to press him on the matter until after dinner, and he’d assumed that Kujou was busy when he didn’t receive a reply. After all, it wasn’t out of the ordinary for them to have long pauses in between their conversations.

He should have known better. There was no way anyone could recover so easily from being kidnapped and watching his younger brother be injured while trying to save him, even if it had been an act.

“I get it if you can’t come, Izumi-ani… But both Ryuu and I don’t know what’s going on and there’s nobody else-”

“Send me your address,” Mitsuki interrupts brusquely as he opens his closet and starts placing his travel essentials into his usual duffel bag. “And if you don't mind, help me think of an explanation for my members? I can’t have them thinking I left on my own all over again.”

At least Yamato-san will be at home this time, so they should be fine. But he’s dreading explaining the situation to Iori and Riku. He can already picture it: _I left to stay over at TRIGGER’s place because your brother was having nightmares about what you did when we were saving him from being kidnapped_. Mitsuki rolls his eyes. That would totally go over well.

Thankfully, the hallway is mostly dark by the time Mitsuki’s packed. He would have asses to kick if that were not the case, anyway. The two doors that still have light streaming out from under them are the two that he’d expected, so he knocks first on Yamato-san’s.

“Mitsu? What is i—” Yamato-san’s voice trails off when he takes in the sight of Mitsuki, jacket zipped up and a travel bag slung over his shoulder. “...Mitsu?” There’s a nervous tremble in his voice. Now is not the time for Mitsuki to deal with all of the implications _that_ carries.

“Let’s talk in Nagi’s room,” Mitsuki says.

* * *

“So you’re going to babysit TRIGGER’s centre, is what I’m getting from this,” Yamato-san says. Mitsuki rolls his eyes. “Sneaking away in the middle of the night, no less. Ichi’s going to be mad in the morning, you know.”

“I’ll message him before he wakes up,” Mitsuki says, scowling. “And if I were going to sneak away, I wouldn’t be talking to the two of you now.”

“ _Don’t worry_ , Mitsuki,” Nagi says, voice soft and eyes tender. “Yamato and I will take good care of everyone. Kujou-shi needs your help now.”

Mitsuki smiles wryly. “I was expecting you to be more upset about this, to be honest.”

“ _Oh_ , Mitsuki,” Nagi says. “Did you forget I was there when you saved Kujou-shi? There was fear in his eyes. It is not a look that suits him.”

“I know,” Mitsuki murmurs. Something flutters nervously in his gut at the memory of the naked terror in Kujou's voice, cutting through his consciousness like a sharp knife even as he tried to hold off the hooligans from getting any closer to Kujou and Riku.

“Kujou-shi must be very lonely right now,” Nagi says. “He needs to be treated with kindness, and Mitsuki is very kind.”

Heat rises to Mitsuki's cheeks. “Nagi…"

His phone pings then, a message from Yaotome that says the taxi he’d booked is arriving soon.

“I need to go, the taxi’s almost here,” he says to his friends. “I’ll be back tomorrow, so help keep an eye out for them until then. There’s no need to tell them too much, either. Leave Kujou out of the details, or Riku will worry.”

“How can this onii-san say no, when our dearest rivals are in a pickle?” Yamato-san says, but his eyes are serious despite the lilting tone. “Take care of yourself too, Mitsu.”

“Make sure Nagi doesn’t stay up all night watching Kokona,” Mitsuki says, shooting Nagi a pointed look. Nagi makes a wounded sound of agreement, and Mitsuki can’t help but smile.

“I’ll see you to the door,” Yamato-san says, getting up and offering Mitsuki a hand. But before Mitsuki can take another step out of Nagi’s room, Nagi’s pulled both himself and Yamato-san into a tight hug.

“ _I’ll miss you_ , Mitsuki,” Nagi says. “ _See you tomorrow_.”

“Geez,” Mitsuki says, though his face is burning. “I’ll be back before you know it.”

* * *

**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** I’m on the way

The ride from the dorm to TRIGGER’s hotel is a fairly long one, but Mitsuki can’t calm down enough to take a nap. Nagi’s words keep replaying in his head — _fear_. Of course Kujou had been scared.

He can’t begin to imagine if he had been in Kujou’s place and Iori in Riku’s. What more with a condition like Riku’s, what more when Kujou had experienced it at its worst, as they were growing up —

 **[YAOTOME GAKU]:** See you at the lobby

How is he going to explain his presence to Kujou, anyway? He doesn’t think Yaotome or Tsunashi-san would have told Kujou that he was coming, because Kujou would have texted him if so. What if Kujou’s asleep?

Mitsuki presses his fingers to his temples. He needs to think of how to word his explanation to his brother, too. Iori has… ah, _opinions_ about Kujou and Riku. The last thing he wants is for Kujou to unintentionally draw a rift between himself and Iori. With things as they are now, nothing could be worse than added friction between IDOLiSH7 and TRIGGER.

 **[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Morning, Iori  
**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** TRIGGER asked an urgent favour  
**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** I’m with them, so please don’t worry  
**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Sorry I didn’t wake you up  
**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Yamato-san and Nagi will tell you more over breakfast, I filled them in before I left  
**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** I’ll be back by dinner!

He takes the opportunity to type out a quick message to their manager as well; though he doesn’t have anything scheduled for the day, she needs to know where to reach him. With that done, he heaves a sigh and lies back against the plush taxi seat. Slumbering Tokyo speeds by the window, and he loses himself in the view.

* * *

As promised, Yaotome is waiting for him in the lobby, and he fills Mitsuki in on the details on the way up. Even so, Mitsuki isn’t prepared for the sheer luxury of their accommodation.

“Wow, you guys live like this?” he whispers to Yaotome in awe. “What the heck is this view! I hope you don’t mind me sleeping on the couch, it’s better than my sleeping bag.”

“You brought a sleeping bag,” Yaotome returns in a loud, confused whisper. “There’s an extra bed in Tenn’s room. This suite is meant for four.”

“You didn’t tell me that, Yaotome!” Mitsuki hisses. “But I wouldn’t want to disturb Kujou if he’s finally gone back to sleep. And he won’t like having his room barged in on without permission, either. The couch is fine.”

“But you’re doing us a favour, Izumi-ani, the least we can—”

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be, Yaotome,” Mitsuki says, frowning now at Yaotome’s tone. “We’re friends, aren’t we? Friends look out for each other when they need help.” He smiles up at Yaotome. “And I’m not just doing it for you guys, I’m doing it for Riku too, you know.”

 _And for my own peace of mind_ , he doesn’t bother adding. If he can be of some help in alleviating Kujou's fear, it’ll be worth it.

Yaotome sighs. “Fine.”

“I’ll be fine,” Mitsuki repeats, setting his bag down and pulling out his small sleeping bag to spread it out on the couch. “You should go sleep, Yaotome. You and Tsunashi-san have an early schedule tomorrow, don’t you? Isn’t that why Tsunashi-san’s asleep even though both of you thought to call me?”

“Nothing escapes you, does it, Izumi-ani?” Yaotome says with a huff. “Tenn will be alone here until our manager comes by for check-out at noon.”

“I’m here now, so he won’t be,” Mitsuki says. “Seriously, Yaotome, go to bed.”

“Thanks again, Izumi-ani,” Yaotome says, patting Mitsuki’s shoulder before heading towards his room. Mitsuki heaves a sigh when the door clicks shut. TRIGGER can be quite a handful, in their own way.

Yawning, he picks up the small bag of groceries he’d grabbed from the dorm fridge earlier (with Yamato-san’s blessings) and brings it over to the kitchenette. At the very least, even if Kujou sleeps through the rest of the night, Mitsuki can make them all breakfast. From the sound of it, all three of them have been eating take-out for the last few days. Home-cooked food will surely be a welcome comfort.

Opting to leave on the table lamp at the other side of the couch, he slips into his sleeping bag. The couch is seriously _so_ comfortable. Is this what it’s like to be in a top idol group? He sends a quick message to Yamato-san and Nagi informing them he’s arrived safely, then lets the soft hum of the aircon lull him to sleep.

* * *

Being a light sleeper, Mitsuki is roused some time later by a noise. Outside the window, the sky is still pitch-black, and the roads are motionless.

Blearily, he checks Yaotome and Tsunashi-san’s room first, making sure that the sound hadn’t originated from them, before going to Kujou’s door and placing his ear against it.

Kujou’s voice is watery, Riku’s name on constant repeat like a prayer — “Don’t touch Riku, Izumi Mitsuki, bring him away, please, leave me beh—”

To hear himself feature in someone else’s nightmare is a deeply uncomfortable experience, especially when Mitsuki can hazard a guess how this particular nightmare goes, because he bore witness to it.

Hearing Kujou sound like this is heart-wrenching, but Mitsuki’s hand still pauses on the door knob. He came here with the knowledge that this would come to pass eventually, but it feels like such a rude intrusion, to enter someone else’s room when they’re at their most vulnerable. What more when they’re not even that close, like himself and Kujou?

They’ll deal with it after, he tells himself as he opens the door. Kujou and himself are both professionals, they’ll work around it.

The light streaming from the bedside lamp illuminates Kujou’s form curled defensively into the sheets.

“Riku,” Kujou sobs, choked and high-pitched. His cheeks are wet. “Riku— stay away, you can’t come here— Izumi Mitsuki, please, take him away—”

“Kujou,” Mitsuki says, grabbing Kujou’s shoulder and giving him a firm shake. “Kujou. Wake up, it’s me. Izumi Mitsuki.”

Kujou tenses, the sobs giving way to whimpers, but Mitsuki doesn’t let go in hopes that the grip will ground Kujou. “Kujou, wake up. It’s a nightmare. You’re fine. Riku is fine.”

Kujou’s brows furrow again before his eyes fly open, terror laid bare in them. He stares up at Mitsuki, breathing hard and heavy, before his mind seems to catch up and register _who_ Mitsuki is.

“Izumi Mitsuki? What are you doing here?”

“Waking you up from a nightmare,” Mitsuki says carefully, letting go this time and stepping back from Kujou to give him breathing space. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Kujou looks away, breaking eye contact. “No.”

Mitsuki had expected as much. If the question were turned on him, he would say the same. Some things are made more terrifying when said out loud, because saying them out loud makes them feel real. “Do you mind if I stay here and keep you company instead?”

He doesn’t wait for an answer before reaching over to the bedside table to pull out a few tissues for Kujou. “Here.”

“Thank you,” Kujou says, still averting his gaze even as he sits up and accepts the tissues. Mitsuki distracts himself by pulling the nearby armchair close to the bed and settling into it. He feels like he’s approaching a cornered cat; it’s hard to tell how Kujou will react, and as much as Mitsuki doesn’t want to leave him alone, neither does he want to press too much.

At least Kujou hasn’t asked him to leave, which seems to be more progress than either Yaotome or Tsunashi-san had achieved.

Being here in Kujou’s room like this in the dead of night brings back a certain nostalgia. The stillness and quiet of everything else reminds him of the rare occasions in the past when Iori had nightmares. Even as a child Iori had never been one for fussing, but some nights he would startle awake and wake Mitsuki by accident. Iori would never let Mitsuki climb up to the top bunk to give him a hug, so Mitsuki would read him stories from the lower bunk, until he heard Iori’s breathing even out.

Those nights had been few and far between, but Mitsuki remembers them like little pockets of time shared between Iori and himself, precious memories of when he could be of some comfort to Iori. Nowadays, he doesn’t get such chances anymore. Iori is grown up now, and he doesn’t come to Mitsuki any longer.

Surely that must be the case for Kujou too, or even more so. To be separated from his family at such a young age, to leave his little brother behind and face the world like an adult when other children his age were still in school — how much growing up had he done, all by himself, when Riku should have been by his side? It would be ridiculous to think he wasn’t lonely.

He doesn’t know what possesses him to speak and break the silence. “Riku’s been well lately. We’re practicing choreo for a new song, and Tamaki says Riku’s dancing has improved.”

Kujou glances at him, eyes guarded. Mitsuki barrels on. “He’s been trying to learn to cook too, ever since…” he falters sheepishly, “ever since Yamato-san and I walked out. Iori still helps him most of the time, but he told us he wants to master cooking omurice. So we’ve been having a lot of omurice lately.” Specifically, Riku wanted to learn to cook omurice because it was his and Kujou’s favourite food as children.

“Tell him not to put too much ketchup,” Kujou says, voice quiet. Clearly, he didn’t need an explanation to put two and two together. “He used to drown his omurice with it.”

Mitsuki chuckles. “He learnt the hard way not to do it, back when we first moved in.”

Kujou raises an eyebrow.

“He was distracted while talking to someone one morning, and started drizzling ketchup all over his omelette. But it wasn’t ketchup… it was Sougo’s hot sauce,” Mitsuki wrinkles his nose at the memory. There had been a lot of panicked screaming in the kitchen that day. “Riku toned down a lot on the ketchup after that.”

“Pfft,” Kujou snorts, but the corners of his lips twitch a little. A load eases from Mitsuki’s heart at the sight, and the air suddenly feels much lighter.

Kujou moves then, pulling his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. His eyes cast somewhere to the left of Mitsuki.

“It feels strange,” he says. “I was usually the one waking Riku up from nightmares. And now I'm the one being woken up. Three times in a row, no less.”

“Kujou—”

“I don’t want to worry Gaku and Ryuu any more than I have,” Kujou says, frowning. “They’ve got enough on their plates to worry about. You’ve heard the rumours, haven’t you?”

“...Yes.” Like it or not, word spread fast. TRIGGER’s absence at the Music Arts Festival had prompted a lot of questions, casting doubt on their professionalism. The studio had been abound with whispers today, and yet all Mitsuki could do was grit his teeth.

“I overheard people in the studio saying TRIGGER’s about to be bought out. That maybe we’ll get disbanded. That we’re bad luck. That’s why they’re cutting us from shows.”

“Kujou…”

There’s a harsh intake of breath from Kujou. “It’s not the first time I’ve heard them saying this. It’s been going on for some time now. Someone’s pulling strings, and it’s not our fault that all of this is- But what happened that day was… I can’t… I can’t let Riku be-”

_I can’t afford to bring bad luck or harm onto Riku._

It hurts to see Kujou like this, shrunk in on himself. Kujou is always so collected and poised, but now it’s clear to see that he’s still a boy, barely older than Iori. “Kujou—”

“And I hit him…” Kujou says, voice barely above a whisper. “I panicked, and I hit him…”

“Alright, stop right there,” Mitsuki says, reaching out a hand and wrapping it around Kujou’s own slender one. “Kujou, your panic was warranted. Even I didn’t know what Riku was planning to do. I told him off last night, after we got lectured by Manager.”

“Your manager lectured you?”

“All of us,” Mitsuki affirms grimly. “For being reckless. She looks so sweet and mild but even our president looked frightened by her. That’s not the point, Kujou! I told Riku that the situation could have gone from _acting_ to reality if something had gone wrong, and I told him to put himself in your shoes for once. The last thing you want is for him to get hurt for you, right? Even if he had good intentions...”

Kujou is silent, and Mitsuki smiles sadly. “That’s how I feel about Iori too. I don’t know how much he’s been hurt while trying to help me.”

The difference here is that the one who has hurt Iori most is Mitsuki himself.

All the times he’d come home from failed audition after failed audition, all the times Iori had come up to him with Plans A, B, C, D of alternative ways for him to market himself, to improve his dancing, to try a different performance. All the times he had blown up at Iori, because how would Iori know how it felt, to fail, and fail, to never be good enough?

His conversation with Iori from the night they walked out of the dorms comes to mind: how Iori had sounded so much at a loss at his apology, as though he had never felt he deserved one — as though he had deserved all of Mitsuki’s anger then. Maybe that hurts even more.

Even now, who knows what kinds of things Iori is keeping to himself so that he won’t hurt Mitsuki? Sometimes he catches Iori sliding glances his way, but he always waves it off before Mitsuki can press. On their interviews together, he steers away from topics of his personal successes. Mitsuki knows it’s not simply because he’s embarrassed, but also because he doesn’t want comparisons to be drawn between them.

“I’d rather get kidnapped and beaten up than have anything happen to Iori, and I know it’s the same for you with Riku, Kujou,” Mitsuki says, cursing the prickling at the back of his eyes. He’s not here to throw a pity party for himself, damn it. “Because no matter how much they grow up, they’re still our younger brothers.”

Kujou sighs into the blankets pulled up around his knees, a long, drawn-out exhale. “I guess.”

“Have you talked to Riku? You have each other on Rabbit Chat, right?”

“...I haven’t replied to his messages,” Kujou confesses.

“Yeah, you didn’t reply to _me_ either,” Mitsuki says, feigning mock offense. “Why don’t you call him tomorrow? It’ll make you feel better if you hear for yourself that he’s fine. He really is, though.”

“Maybe I will,” Kujou concedes, and yawns.

“You should get some sleep,” Mitsuki says. “You said you kept Riku company when he had nightmares, right? I’ll keep you company tonight.”

“Izumi Mitsuki…” Kujou says, a pale flush rising to his cheeks.

“Hey, don’t look at me like that,” Mitsuki chides. “Iori never let me take care of him like this.”

“So you’re projecting your big brother fantasies onto me?” Kujou asks, but the stiff line of his shoulders has eased.

“If you feel well enough to argue then you should go back to sleep,” Mitsuki retorts. “You need to be taken care of sometimes, Kujou. Whether it’s by Yaotome or Tsunashi-san or Riku. Or even me.”

“How can you and Gaku say things like that, it’s so embarrassing,” Kujou says with a pained grimace, but he uncurls himself and lies back down.

“At least I didn’t offer to sing you a lullaby. MEZZO has some nice ballads, you can take your pick—”

Kujou looks alarmed at that. “Please don’t, you’ll wake Gaku and Ryuu up. They have a morning schedule later.”

“Alright, alright,” Mitsuki says, biting back a chortle. “Go to sleep.”

Kujou levels him a considering gaze, then reaches out for the bedside lamp.

“I’m fine with sleeping with the light on. You don’t have to switch it off, Kujou—”

Kujou smiles, and this time it’s a smile Mitsuki has never seen before. It’s a small, soft one, nothing like the one he uses on stage, nor like the smirks he uses with his members. Though this whole night has been surreal, this in particular makes it feel like Mitsuki is seeing a side of Kujou he’s never seen before.

“I don’t think I’ll need it anymore,” Kujou says, and flicks it off. There’s a rustle of blankets, then silence. When Mitsuki’s eyes have adjusted to the darkness, he finds Kujou looking at him, eyes bright in what little light trickles from the window on the other side of the room.

“Thank you, Izumi Mitsuki.”

“Don’t mention it, Kujou. Goodnight.”

There’s another heartbeat of awkward silence, then Mitsuki reaches out a hand to feel for Kujou’s. The first time he had woken Riku up from a nightmare, Riku had mentioned Kujou doing something to soothe him to sleep. It’s worked for Riku ever since, so surely it must work for Kujou, right?

“May I ask what you are doing, Izumi Mitsuki?”

“Go to sleep, Kujou,” Mitsuki says, as he keeps his hold loose and uses his thumb to rub slow, gentle circles into the back of Kujou’s hand. “I told you, I’m keeping you company tonight.”

“Embarrassing...” Kujou mumbles, but he doesn’t pull his hand away. Mitsuki smiles to himself. Being an older sibling can be terribly lonely at times. Even for Kujou, or rather, _especially_ for Kujou, who probably carries more on his shoulders than Mitsuki knows. The least Mitsuki can do right now is to show him that he’s not alone.

When Mitsuki hears Kujou’s breathing even out, he uses his free hand to pillow his head against the soft blankets, before dozing off as well. He’ll need to be up in an hour or two, anyway.


	3. TENN

Tenn wakes up when the sky is starting to lighten.

Everything from last night comes rushing back at once. First, the nightmares: Riku growing breathless and crumpling to the floor, those masked men hitting Riku, the coarse ropes digging into his wrists as he struggled to get to Riku. Then, being woken up by Ryuu, and again by Izumi Mitsuki. Tenn would think that he had dreamt up Izumi Mitsuki’s presence last night, if not for the heavy warmth against his side, and the small hand slipped into his.

The same question he had asked returns to mind. Why is Izumi Mitsuki here? Had Gaku and Ryuu asked him to come over, in the middle of the night? How mortifying, that he had worried his members so much that they had to turn to another group for help.

But he couldn’t have told Ryuu and Gaku the truth. There was too much on all of their minds, and he couldn’t add more stress on top of everything they were going through. It _would_ have been fine, Tenn reasons to himself, if it was just him being locked up and trapped in an abandoned building for almost twenty-four hours. If Riku had not gotten involved, maybe it wouldn’t be this bad.

He sighs towards the ceiling. What was it that Mitsuki had said last night?

_“No matter how much they grow up, they’re still our younger brothers.”_

There had been so much sadness in Mitsuki’s eyes when he said that. Tenn wonders for a moment what kind of childhood the Izumi siblings must have shared, that would bring such pain to Mitsuki’s eyes. They seem to get along well, nothing like himself and Riku, after all.

But talking to Mitsuki had helped. Embarrassing though it had been, to have such a weak side of himself on display, it had helped to get everything off his chest. Breathing feels a little easier today.

He angles his body a little to where Mitsuki is still sprawled against his bed, light hair a mess against the blankets, and wonders why the other had not taken the spare bed. It is uncomfortable to sleep in this position; Tenn knows from falling asleep too many times by Riku’s hospital bed.

He wriggles a little, wanting to free himself enough to get out of bed and put a blanket over Mitsuki. Instead, to his alarm, Mitsuki’s grip tightens on his hand before he stirs, letting go of Tenn and sitting up. He blinks a bit, as though trying to collect his bearings and remember where he is, before he looks over at Tenn.

“Good morning, Kujou,” he says through a yawn. “You should sleep more.”

“Sorry for waking you up,” Tenn says, feeling guilty. If he knew Mitsuki was such a light sleeper, he wouldn’t have moved at all.

“Nah,” Mitsuki says, as he covers another yawn. “I’ll take a nap after breakfast.”

“...Breakfast?”

“Yeah,” Mitsuki says, grinning. “I brought some food from the dorms last night, and it’ll feel weird for me to lie around this huge suite anyway.”

He clambers to his feet, groaning as he stretches. “I’ll wake you up when the food’s ready,” he says. “Go get some more sleep, Kujou. You hardly slept.”

Tenn is in disbelief. Izumi Mitsuki travelled all the way here after a long day of work, kept him company through a nightmare, and is making breakfast for them first thing in the morning?

“It’s fine, we’ve troubled you so muc-” Tenn’s voice trails off at the dark scowl on Mitsuki’s face, which passes as quickly as it comes.

Mitsuki sighs. “You and Yaotome are really birds of a feather. Take this as IDOLiSH7 cheering on you guys.” He takes two brisk steps towards the door, then turns back to Tenn.

“If you’re not going back to sleep, you can come help me in the kitchen, Kujou.”

* * *

Izumi Mitsuki in the kitchen is very different from, yet very similar to, Izumi Mitsuki on stage. He moves through the kitchen like a well-practiced dance, handling the saucepans and toaster without missing a beat. Tenn can’t help but watch in awe as he lays out the plates, feeling like he’s seeing a whole different side of Izumi Mitsuki.

The bacon has started to sizzle by the time Gaku and Ryuu emerge from their room, calling out good mornings.

“Morning, you guys,” Mitsuki calls cheerfully. “Breakfast is almost ready.”

“Mitsuki-kun… ”

“... Breakfast?”

“I tried stopping him, but he almost chewed my head off,” Tenn supplies when he notices Gaku and Ryuu staring at him in bewilderment.

“Izumi-ani chewed _your_ head off? You, Kujou Tenn?” Gaku asks in further disbelief. Tenn considers stepping on his foot, but decides not to ruin the atmosphere. It’s been a while since things felt this light for all of them.

“Stop with that, you guys!” Mitsuki says, right as the bread jumps in the toaster. “Every good day starts with a good breakfast, you know!”

It _is_ a good breakfast. In fact, it’s probably the first time they’re having a home-cooked breakfast together. Usually when they lodge together for work, they end up settling for take-out meals or grab convenience store food when schedules are tight. This is a refreshing change, especially since Izumi Mitsuki is such a good cook. To think IDOLiSH7 gets to eat like this every day. Tenn is almost envious.

“Are you feeling better, Tenn?” Ryuu asks, and Gaku looks up too, unusually quiet. Tenn’s heart twinges with guilt, though he keeps his poker face.

“I am now,” he says, then adds in a small voice, “Sorry for making you worry.”

“I’m glad,” Gaku says, turning his attention back to his food. “I mean- I guess there are things you don’t want to tell us.” He pauses, then gives Mitsuki a pointed look. “But at least you told _someone_.”

“H-Hey!” Mitsuki flusters. “I’m starting to feel like I’m fourth-wheeling this conversation!”

They all burst into laughter, even Tenn unable to withhold a small chuckle of his own, and for a while it feels like everything’s back to normal, though nothing is.

* * *

“Have you called Riku yet?” Mitsuki asks when he walks back into the living room to sit down next to Tenn on the couch. Gaku and Ryuu had left after breakfast for their interview, and Tenn had gone to pack up his belongings while Mitsuki took a shower.

“Not yet,” Tenn says, glancing over at Mitsuki. Mitsuki’s hair is still damp, and there’s a small towel draped around his neck. “You’ll catch a cold like that.” It’s an instinctive rebuke, one he’s used many times on Riku and Gaku, but this is _Izumi Mitsuki_. Tenn freezes, but against all expectations, Mitsuki laughs, bright and vibrant and warm.

“Spoken like a true older brother, Kujou!” he says. ”It’s a bad habit. I try to be better about it back at the dorms, but sometimes I slip up when nobody’s looking.”

“I’m looking, though,” Tenn says flatly, unsure what to make of this new information.

“Don’t look, then!” Mitsuki retorts with a grin as he slides closer to Tenn, his eyes sparkling with mischief. Tenn doesn’t get a chance to say anything else before Mitsuki’s expression turns serious. “But seriously though, you sh- Kujou!?”

“Your little brother will come after my head if you get a cold,” Tenn says, pulling the towel up over Mitsuki’s hair and bracketing Mitsuki’s head with his arms. “I don’t want to make an enemy of IDOLiSH7, Izumi Mitsuki. Especially not over you.”

Carefully, he squeezes out the ends of Mitsuki’s short hair the way he used to for Riku when they were younger. Sometimes Riku wouldn’t be awake, under one sedative or another, and the nurses would wash his hair while he lay immobile. Tenn would insist on being the one to help towel him dry, so that if he woke up it would be Tenn’s face he saw first.

Here, Mitsuki has gone still, head lowered and surprisingly docile as Tenn works. Like this, it hits Tenn how slight Mitsuki is, and the contrast only serves to highlight the size of Mitsuki’s presence. He has seen Mitsuki manhandle Rokuya Nagi and Nikaidou Yamato enough to know he can and will push Tenn away if he wants to. And yet, Mitsuki hasn’t done anything. The knowledge makes the weight of _this_ feel all the heavier.

When he finally releases Mitsuki, hair dried to Tenn’s satisfaction and gently tousled, Mitsuki is quiet. “Thanks, Kujou,” he says, a light flush on his cheeks.

Heat rushes to Tenn’s face again, when he realises what exactly he’s just done. He drops his gaze. “Sorry, I overstepp—”

“It’s fine,” Mitsuki interrupts, grinning. “You’re cute like this, you know. I can see how you and Riku are twins. And I can see how much you took care of Riku.”

“What—”

“Which brings me back to the point, Kujou, that you should call Riku,” Mitsuki says, a glint in his eye. “He has an afternoon schedule today. I bet he’ll be delighted to get a call from his big brother before work.”

“Will you leave me alone if I call him?”

Mitsuki looks like he’s considering it, and something must show on Tenn’s face, because he breaks into another sunny smile. “I’ll leave you before your manager catches me.”

Tenn sighs and wakes his phone, then pulls up Riku’s contact.

Riku answers on the second ring, voice full of disbelief. “T-Tenn-nii?”

“Riku,” Tenn says, feeling an indescribable wave of relief wash over him. He leans back into the couch, dimly aware of Mitsuki getting off the couch and going into the bedroom.

“Tenn-nii? Is everything okay? We heard something happened with TRIGGER and Mitsuki went over late last night— is Mitsuki with you?!”

“He’s not here right now, but he’s here,” Tenn says, unable to help the fond squeeze of his heart. “Everything’s fine. Sorry for worrying you, he’ll be going back soon.”

“As long as Tenn-nii is fine, that’s good enough!” Riku says cheerfully, and Tenn is gripped by a strong suspicion that Riku knows why he’s calling after all.

“Is that so,” he says. “Do your best at work later, Riku.”

“I will! I’ll message you after that!”

“...Alright,” Tenn resigns himself to saying. “Bye, Riku.”

“Bye, Tenn-nii!”

* * *

“Well then,” Mitsuki says, glancing around the suite one more time and patting his pockets to ensure that everything is accounted for. “Your manager’s arriving soon, right?”

“Yes,” Tenn says. Gaku and Ryuu’s bags are sitting on the couch, next to Tenn’s own. Anesagi’s due to come by for check out.

“Yaotome says the taxi’s almost here too,” Mitsuki says. “I’ll go on ahead, Kujou.”

“Okay.” Tenn is almost sorry to see Mitsuki go; the rest of the morning had flown by after the call with Riku. He’d chatted with Mitsuki for a while, and they’d hopped from topic to topic easily with nary a pause. Mitsuki had something to say about everything, whether a good vegan burger place, or the rise of the indies music scene in Japan. Tenn had found himself wanting to talk with the other more, fascinated as he was by everything that Mitsuki had to say.

“Hey, don’t look so sad,” Mitsuki teases. Tenn immediately looks away, embarrassed at having been seen through so easily. “Let’s go out for dinner someday! Just the two of us.”

“...Sure,” Tenn mutters awkwardly, and Mitsuki cocks an unimpressed eyebrow at him.

“You could at least sound a bit more enthusiastic about it, you know.”

“Gaku’s taxi’s going to leave if you don’t go.”

Mitsuki laughs. “Fine, fine, I get it.” Right as he’s made to move away, he swivels around instead, stepping straight into Tenn’s personal bubble and popping it wholly as he pulls Tenn into a brief, firm hug.

“Take care, Kujou.”

Tenn barely has time to register the words before Mitsuki’s one foot out of the door, a blinding smile on his face. Tenn’s heart is pounding.

* * *

“Anyway, I thought I saw Izumi Mitsuki from IDOLiSH7 at the hotel lobby earlier,” Anesagi says offhandedly as she drives back to the Yaotome Productions headquarters.

Tenn looks out of the window, feigning disinterest. “Huh. Why would he be here? Their dorms are on the other side of the city. Surely they can’t afford a room there?”

“That’s true,” Anesagi says.

Tenn pulls up his Rabbit Chat, tapping out a quick message.

 **[KUJOU TENN]:** Thank you

A reply comes in barely 30 seconds later.

 **[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Not at all!!  
**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** Let’s go for dinner soon!  
**[KUJOU TENN]:** Sure  
**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:** At least pretend you're excited for it!!  
**[IZUMI MITSUKI]:  
[KUJOU TENN]: **

* * *

That night, back in his room at Kujou’s house, Tenn has a warm and dreamless sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you [ewagan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ewagan/pseuds/ewagan) for providing a shoulder and patient ear for all my whining and crying!
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/rielavity)


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